I need to brag on my cherubs for a second because I am so extremely proud of them. We have finished taking our Winter NWEA test. On average, the class grew 9 points from the fall NWEA. Almost every student exceeded their growth goal (two students stayed the same).
Today was a good win in my Teaching Land.
On the last day of seniors, the seniors gave to me:
Twelve months of mayhem
Eleven seconds crying
Ten minutes of cleaning
Nine teachers looking
Eight periods of confusion
Seven seniors snickering
Six pairs of googley eyes
Five minutes of shouting (I HAVE A ROOM FULL OF BOOTIES)
Four Corgi booties
Three "seeing lamps"
Two sriracha bottles
and one sriracha parade.
Student: "I wonder what would happen if you smoke a hotdog..."
Student: "Can you get us Starbucks if I give you money?"
Student: "But I'll give you money."
Student: "But you're white and I'm Mexican. Share your white privilege with me."
Student: Ms. Daley wanna know how to spell future? F-A-U. Wait. Shit. That's not how you spell failure.
I pride myself on being funny* but sometimes I don't realize I am funny.
*I'm not funny. At all. I yell at my students to laugh at my "dad" jokes.
Me: "Crap! I need white out! Does anyone have any?"
Student: "Just use your finger."
Me: *looks at finger* *looks at paper* *places finger on paper* *picks up finger* *realizes my finger is white*
Student (who saw my realization): "Dang fam"
At least, on this day, she wrote neatly.
Scene: grammar jeopardy with a bunch of competitive 10th graders.
Me: Question for 300: what is the noun form of the word 'borrowed'?
Me: The answer is borrower.
Student: "Borrower?! That ain't a word!"
Me: "Yes it is. Sit down."
Scene: I'm reading "The Monkey's Paw" to my lovely cherubs. In the middle of the introduction of part 1, a scholar said:
"So I've been thinking. What do you actually have going for you? You're not married. You don't have a cat and you don't have kids."
I stared at them for a good 30 seconds (I've been practicing my wait time) and said, "I actually have a cat."
This is definitely first place worthy.