12th Grade Englishy Friends
Student J: “ Did you hear about all the scholarships our class got?!”
Me: “No, how much?”
Student J: “ 6 million! “ Picks up her phone says, “A, does Jacksonville do that?!”
Im assuming A mumbled something sarcastic back because J said, “Girl I got some of that money! It was easy! All I had to say was I’m a lesbian! I got money for being a lesbian!”
2nd grade Land
Student 1: “Ms Daley!” Hugs me then plays with the ties on my dress. “You look decent today!”
Me: “Just decent? I thought I looked pretty good!”
Student 1 : “Yeah, just decent.”
Student 2: “ That’s mean! She looks beautiful!”
Student 1: “ Quit sucking up just because you want markers.”
12th grade englishy friends
Teacher: “E, I’m going to need you to move your boulder.”
E: “iight. I’ll be back.”
Some time later.
E, busts through the door, kisses biceps, and says, “Mustang and Sally are ready.”
Student 1: “Ms. Daley, can ... * mumbles something while holding a thumb tack*”
Student 1 : “Ptt. Ms. Daley. Can I use the thumb tack and pick your nail polish off?
Me, exchanging looks with student 2 : “ I’m sorry, what?”
Student 2: “Boy! If you ask her something stupid one more time imma call your grandma!”
Student: “Ms. Daley, do girls poop?”
Before I can answer, Student M, a girl, stands up a passes gass.
M: “Does that answer your question?”
Me, acting my age, “What’s poop spelled backwards?”
Student G shouts, “Poop! *giggles intensely*
During recess, my cherubs “beat up” their imaginary friends. Excuse my laughter, I couldn’t help it.
Today in Teaching Land, a parent told me that her son started talking in his sleep about our class work. Apparently her older son woke up to my student mumbling something about CNN Student News. Her older son asked him again and he replied, “I just love CNN Student News.”
Scene: I finished up proctoring the ACT Aspire Reading test and walked back into my classroom. One of my students, S, ran over to me as I walked in the room.
S: “Ms. Daley, Ms. Crockett can draw. You can’t draw Ms. Daley!”
Me: “ Ok, S, Ms. Crockett is a great artist and I’m not but that was rude.”
S: “ Aw Ms. Daley but you drew something yesterday and it was good and Ms. Crocket just drew A and it was really good.”
Me: “Again! And what did I say to you yesterday?!”
Other Student: “She saiiiid if you’re going to make fun of her coat of arms drawing she ain’t gonna show you.”
Me: *hair flip* “Plus Ms. Crockett is an artist”
I’m walking a student, let’s call him S, back in the classroom. S, who’s already in trouble for shouting in class, didn’t seem to understand his talk with the principal.
S: “Ms. Daley, you walk like a boss.”
Me: “That’s ‘cause I am a boss. Now are you suppose to be talking right now?”
I used to teach 5th grade at a school down the street from my current school. Call it a small world, but I'm actually teaching a former 5th grader's brother. Turns out it was her birthday yesterday and she wanted me to have a piece of her cookie cake. It even survived her brother's book bag :)
Today a teacher asked a group of 5th grade students what type of books they would like to read. She got a few typical responses: animals, friends, etc. One wanted to read WWII books so he can draw pictures of meat shields.
Things I Didn’t Think I’d Have To Say
Me: “Yes, Patrick*. Do you have a question?”
Patrick: “What shoe size are you?”
Me: “That’s an odd question. Did you buy me shoes?”
Me: “Then you don’t really need to know then do you?”
Me: “Um excuse me! Don’t stick your fingers in an outlet!”
* As always, the names have been changed to protect the innocent or not so innocent.
I found this gem
A student changed his name
We found Pennywise again... just kidding. It was actually a ball
Second graders Deal With SeveNth Graders
Student: “Ms. Daley and then and then she made my sister cry. And I’m sorry Ms. Daley but I yelled at her.”
Student 2(sister): “She did yell at Abby*”
Student: “So then she called me the B word and swung her purse at me.”
Student 2: “Its trues Ms. Daley. “
Student: “Yea and then I called her the B word too. And then Abby telled me to spell it and I did Ms. Daley I did.”
*Names were changed to protect the innocent and not so innocent
Student 1: “Look Ms. Daley!! We did it!”
Me: “YAY! Proud of you!”
Student 2: “Let’s take a picture.”
Me: “Ok! QUICK! Everyone get together and say, ‘I’m successful!’”
Students: Insert five variations.
Student 3: “Let us see it!”
Student 2: “Oh no. I look ratchet. Do it again.”
Me: “Only if y’all can say successful together.”
Student 4: “ Ms. Daley, that’s extra.”
Me: being extra “Do you want the picture or not?!”
6/7 graders building reading stamina
I’m attending the Arkansas Department of Education Science of Reading Conference in Hot Springs, Arkansas. Before lunch, I visited a few vendors and lost track of time. I notice that most of the food was gone, so I tried to track down a waiter.
Me: “Excuse me.”
What looks to be a college student turns around.
Me: “Do I just sit down where there’s a plate?”
Waiter: “Yes, or you can bring it to your friends.”
Me: accidentally vocalizing thoughts “I actually don’t have friends.”
Waiter: shifts uncomfortably “Oh I’m sorry.”
The library .... which is where I'm going to get my lovelies some books! There will be a FOCAL book sale at the River Market today from 5:30 to 7:30. If you are in Arkansas, you should check it out! It's in the basement of the River Market Books and Gifts (behind the library) and all books, for members, are 50% off! Super cool!
Like many of you, I can’t seem to shake this anxiety this week’s events has left. It seems like nothing will change and it’s hard to stop thinking about all the lives that were cut short. I’m trying to change my focus to things I can control; my actions in and out of the classroom.
I can control what I teach them and how I support them. I will encourage them, dry their eyes, and laugh with them. I will get frustrated with them, but then forgive. I will celebrate and protect them.
I will do all this because I can help them become good men and women. That I can control.
Scene: I’m standing at the main door while students are being dismissed.
Older Sibling sees Younger Sibling and skips over to him. The Older Sibling bends over to grab the Younger Sibling’s shoulders and begins to shake him vigorously until his hat falls off. While all this is happening, Older Sibling is screaming, “I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I’M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU!”
I hope you have been greeted like this today 🙂
Student (interrupts lesson for an “emergency question,” whispers): “Ms. Daley, do they have planes in *incoheren*?”
Me: “Planes? Where?”
Student repeats his same questions but softer.
Me (getting annoyed): “Speak up. I know you can talk louder.”
Student: “Do they has planes in Irish?”
Me (pausing for a second to figure out what he asked): “In Irish??”
Student (sighs heavily and rolls eyes): “Yeah. Like Africa but Irish.”
Me (mimics student’s sigh and eye roll): “I think you mean Ireland.”
Student (not appreciating my mocking gesture) “No. I mean Irish. Like the place.”
Me: “Oh. Ok.... well I’m not sure about ‘Irish’ but Ireland definitely has planes.”
*Side note: The biggest thing about middle schoolers that I despise is their entitlement.